Men cheat. Women take the flak: Case in point – Kristen Stewart VS Rupert Sanders

I don’t know much about Kristen Stewart and neither do I want to know. I am not a fan of the Twilight series of books by Stephenie Meyer nor have I been inclined to watch the movie version of the books in which Stewart plays the leading role. Being the mother of two teenage sons, I’ve heard about “Bella”, the character that Stewart plays in the Twilight movies, which won her a worldwide following of young fans. I did go and watch another movie she stars in, “Snow-white and the Huntsman” due to high praise for it from a friend who had watched it, not once but twice, but I came away disappointed. I only fancied the acting of Charlize Theron who plays the role of the wicked queen while Stewart played  the damsel in distress AKA Snow White, not very impressively.

But today my post is not about the Twilight books or the movies but it’s a post in defense of Kristen Stewart, the real life person who is making headline news across the world, not for her acting talents, but for cheating on her boyfriend with Rupert Sanders, (first time I heard of the guy) the much older, very much married director of “Snow-white and ….…..”   And it seems very obvious by now that only she is getting all the flak for their little misadventure with headlines screaming that Kristen Stewart cheated on her boyfriend with a married man while the guy, who was more than a willing accomplice, is being let off easily by the media and probably the fans.

This brings me to the reason why I thought of writing this post. Why is it always the woman who comes out looking like the villain when an infidelity of this nature becomes public? In this case the guy, a married man in his 40s with two kids, chose to cheat on his wife and but is pretty much getting mollycoddled by the media. If you take a man in his 40s and a girl in her early 20s (She 22 BTW), who should be the more leveled headed one, the  stronger one able to resist temptation?  I would say the man, very clearly in this case.  Despite her star status, the girl probably got flattered by an older, good-looking man paying extra attention to her and the man, the married one, should have thought twice before putting himself in a comprising situation. Well he did not and all hell has broken loose and poor Bella is slandered all around as the slut, a home wrecker etc.

I just saw a story that Sanders’ wife Liberty Ross has posted a nasty cartoon depicting Stewart as not so innocent but if I were her, I‘d be having a serious talk with the husband before maligning the other party to the infidelity.

Take the case of Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. Being the President of the supposedly most powerful nation in the world, having publicly proclaimed,”I did not have sex with that woman,”  only to admit later to an  affair with the White House intern,  what was the outcome. Of the two who came out looking the  villain in the episode? Certainly not Clinton.

The mindset to apportion blame disproportionately to women in such instances probably has to do with stories like that of Adam & Eve where the woman is shown as the one who is unable to resist temptation as well as being the temptress. Terms such as the “The Other Woman” have come to be used in a derogatory manner so that the blame almost always lies with the woman, when in reality it takes two to tango.

Which is why it is so sick to hear Sanders come with a pathetic statement expressing remorse for his behavior? ’’My beautiful wife and heavenly children are all I have in this world. ‘I love them with all my heart. I am praying that we can get through this together,’ Sanders said. I am sure he had a heavenly time with Stewart too, which he will not admit to.

To  cheat or not to cheat is a personal choice .But guys like Sanders should at least use the same excess testosterone levels in their system, which led to the infidelity in the first place, to admit he had a darn good time while it lasted and also admit that he would be continuing with the indiscretion if the lid was not blown.

For those of you interested, here is a link to another article in Stewart’s defense:

Here is something funny I found as well:

“Someone told me the delightful story of the crusader who put a chastity belt on his wife and gave the key to his best friend for safekeeping, in case of his death. He had ridden only a few miles away when his friend, riding hard, caught up with him, saying ‘You gave me the wrong key!” 

― Anaïs Nin


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7 thoughts on “Men cheat. Women take the flak: Case in point – Kristen Stewart VS Rupert Sanders”

  1. Rather unfair on men! I think most men do have guilt feelings but I am not saying anymore.
    Re Old William Clinton, I think he is paying the price now because Hillary is now hogging the limelight whilst Bill is probably contemplating his guilty past….with a cigar?

  2. Men always make women the keepers of tradition, culture and keepers of the home which is crap. that’s another reason that the society puts the blame on women when something like this happens. It always thinks that though the girls is much younger (in Kristen’s case) she should know not to give in to ‘temptation’ though the man was more than willing and persuasive. For that she gets blamed as a home wrecker which is totally absurd.

  3. i entirely agree chandini and yazmin. it is very unfair to pin the blame on women. i am 52 and can’t say for certain whether i could resist the temptation to attempt or tempt the other gender given an opportunity. frankly even when there is no opportunity most men like me are always looking to create an opportunity.

  4. You are right, although Kristin Stewart is without guilt in the event, it seems that the media is placing most, if not all, the blame onto Stewart. Secondly, eh who cares? Celebrities have lives too…and that means mistakes as well — this is just another example of the media flocking to inflate celebrity narcissistic lives.

  5. They dont say sex sells for nothing, I guess. I think even celebrities need to have their privacy respected to some extent at least. Its absurd to trail them around and pick on each mistake they make.

  6. I agree with your views because yes, this whole ‘Blaming Stewart’ thing also made me wonder- ‘Why only her?’ The society , no matter what country it is, still sees down upon women in such incidences. The man stands tall and firm as if he had the liberty to do what he did and the woman is considered the rule-breaker. It is mandatory to be justified in our behaviour and attitude ….and to look at both the genders ‘equally’…I am a feminist to an extent and thus this viewpoint bothers me!

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